Saturday, January 24, 2009

Compromising self esteem

There are those who are always ready to insult others if given a chance and those who even after getting a rightful chance to settle scores, show compassion just to earn love and respect. But this latter set of fools, ultimately subject themselves to insult and treachery.
I am the one who has never earned accolades for good deeds but yes, i have always earned insult and embarrassment for every supposedly wrong thing that i have done and that to at the hands of my own people.I am surrounded by people who have established relations just for NAMESAKE.Those are not friends who always ask for explanations.Those are enemies in guise of friends who instead of filling in for friends' infirmities exploit it.
All this is because now a days friendship is only for convenience.People now have several set of friends and for each set we have different face.
One set-with whom we study.
another-with whom we play.
another-with whom we like to spend time because they are our source of enjoyment.
I am the one who is only for satisfying others thirst for mirth.For everything else there is "Master Card".My humorous nature has always been my enemy.I am never taken seriously by others.Whole day i fool around -joking- making others laugh.I know i am not doing any social service but still i do it because i like it, when everyone feels happy in my company.But this jokey personality of mine has never earned me friends but fun seekers ,who in pursuit of happiness join me in good times, but never turn up in times of need, though many a times they offer two or three consoling words .I never show my disapproval to my friends but they always do.I love to make my friends happy by offering them chocolates.Whenever someone comes to my place i give them full attention .If they want i make them rest on my bed while i sit on chair.To see them off i always accompany them to their bikes.But all these actions of mine have brought me no respect.

Why is it that ,friends do not understand what the other person wants.If one is not in mood for "time pass" ,why is he always forced to do that.Why is it like -friends enforcing their will on others.
Sun does not rise at same time at every place similarly everyone is different and one person's wish may not necessarily be in conjugation with others.Why is it that we do not respect others decision.If one cannot understand someone even after spending a lot of time with him/her ,then there is no point continuing with that relationship.Never go to a place where you are not respected.Never meet the one who does not care for your self-esteem.
Its true-jhukti hai duniya jhukane wala chahiye and i have numerous of these jhukane wale.
Whenevr there is a need for a joker i am called but on rest all occasions i am never remembered.
One who is selfish triumphs in today's world so from now on i will work only to meet my selfish ends .To hell with the rest.

Here i remember one line that one of my friends told me-"Life is like a football match and you are a goalkeeper .No matter how many goals you save ... you will be remembered for the one you did not."

Now what i am going to write is not a part of the original post.I know i have been too harsh with my words.But this is just because i was very emotional ,offended and humiliated by something.May be my friends would not agree with some of the things i have written, but please bear with this.I definitely think , what i wrote is true.I have never been able to put forth my grievances to whom i should have but through this i want others to tell me why do they do this to me.. i wrote this because my expectations were a bit higher from them.I want them to think with cool mind whether they were correct or not.If they were wrong anywhere then please just accept it because "you cannot improve if cannot accept your fault" but if they still think that i am being wrong here then please do give feedback (positive).This should be taken as a platform to clear all suspicions and misconceptions rather than as another reason to fight.

6 comments:

Knight Samar said...

" All this is because now a days friendship is only for convenience. People now have several set of friends and for each set we have different face..."

How did you sum up this ? Its wonderful. Ever considered anthropology ? You should!

Anyways, on the serious side, I too can't figure many a times what the person in front of me is, but I think thats the best -- not attaching labels or a constant thought to people. All are dynamic and keep improving(or degrading) in one aspect or the other...Its kind of difficult to tell, but I like that way.

Love you GD for the way you express! :)

g_d_22 said...
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g_d_22 said...
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g_d_22 said...

thanks for all your views and compliments.
Now that you have advised me to consider anthropology, i will think about it very seriously.
You asked -"How did you sum up this ?
For that i just want to tell you that whatever i write is what i ,myself, feel and do.Further ,i think, since we all are same so these feelings also must be residing in each of us though in varying quantities.

Fintellix said...

Well, after reading all this i can only say one thing... You are too critical in thinking. What i mean is that you think too much. Why do you always have to think in such a manner that you are being nice and the others are not? why are you prejudice in your thinking that your "friends" think of you as a clown(lol i don't know which set of friends now)
As far as i know that, their is only 1 deifnation of a "friend". You dont have a play/study/timepass friend! If you do then either you are living in some other world of which i don't know of or you are being Cheated by your so called friends...
When someone calls you over for your so called "timepass", it purely means that he/she likes to spend time with you. If he/she wouldnt have considered you as a friend then you would have never been invited...
When people shout on you, they do it for a reason. They are disappointed with you and they express themselves. If you don't, that is an issue concerning you and you itself.
When your friends call you over to have some fun try going atleast 1 out of 5times. Don't say a no each and every time.
And please get off your pesimistic unrealistic and prejudice opinion of you being called as a clown. grow up...

PS: You write very well, continue the good stuff!

g_d_22 said...

yaar...i am critical but not "too critical". May be i am a little too harsh with my words but still there is some amount of truth in what i wrote.So i think the gap closing process should be initiated from both sides.
You only tell..the other day you were not ready to come with us for dinner but no one objected to it, that harshly...so this is what i meant to say....there can be variation in opinions so its better we ...